“Am I Enough?”

Awesome post. Not much that I can add – I think it’s all there!  I can’t speak for my wife, but I’m sure there were/are many days she has thought this way.

Barren to Beautiful

This week my husband walks in the door after a long day at work to find: dishes piled in the sink, laundry all over the living room, the beef for dinner still in a frozen block, and me…looking like Frump Queen. He is gracious. And tells me to take a nap. I instantly obey. (Inwardly rejoicing.) And while I am sleeping for 45 minutes, he manages to clean the whole house…while watching our daughter. (A feat I clearly was incapable of accomplishing today. Many days.)

One part of my feels grateful the house is clean. I can relax now, right? But the other (bigger) part of me feels guilty and defeated. He just worked the whole day at his job, and then came home and did mine, too. Isn’t this why I am staying home? 

Every day I have this desire to accomplish something. But every day it feels I accomplish nothing. I…

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Gender Wars?

gender-symbols1Over the last couple of weeks I’ve read a couple of articles related to the roles of dads…I’ve debated on whether to give them any credit here. I guess you’ll have to continue reading to find out if I do or not.

Essentially the role of the “new dad” – the one that takes an active role in the raising of his children, changes diapers, makes bottles, gets up in the middle of the night, or takes paternity leave – is brought under fire.  Points were made that by moving into these roles, dads were “moving out of the board room” or “neglecting financial responsibilities”. It seems to me there is a bit of a double standard going on here – if there’s a better word, help me out.  I’m looking for thoughts here.  I’ll certainly give mine.

I’ve been thinking about these articles all day, as it directly calls into question how I see myself as a dad. Not only that, I think it calls into question how we in turn raise our children.

Immediately when I knew I was having girls, I knew there would be things I would teach them. I would teach them how to throw a football, how to change a tire, how to check the oil in her car – I think you get the point.  I knew there would be things I would teach my girls that typically guys know how to do.

This is seen as typically acceptable though.

However, it doesn’t seem acceptable the other way around.  We don’t hear of teaching boys how to cook, or wash clothes, or iron clothes.

Or take care of children.

But if I’d had a boy, this is exactly what I would have done.  I would have taught him how to throw an awesome spiral with a football, but I’d also teach him how to wash his own clothes.  I’d teach him how to be a man in more ways than just baiting a hook or changing a flat tire.  I think our boys need to be taught how to be men by how to take care of others.

I get it I guess. These things aren’t “manly”. But why aren’t they?  Why is our society so focused on the fact that being a man only means this or that – it certainly never means being a dad that knows how to change a diaper, fix a little girls hair, or get her dressed for her dance recital?

Why aren’t they just as accepted? Why are dads looked down on that take time off from work when a child is born? Why are dad’s forced into the role of the seemingly disinterested, distant “baby-sister” or just the guy who is around somewhere, who really doesn’t know anything?  Dads are looked down on for taking an active role in the lives of their children – and that’s discouraging to me.

As I’ve read other dad bloggers say…we’ve still got a lot of work to do…


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Name Change!

Just wanted to give everyone, I think that’d be about 3 of you – and I’m very thankful for those 3 of you that read – that I’ll be updating/changing the name/address of my blog here on WP.  The new address will be to reflect the name of my blog.  Currently, it is just a generic address that I picked before I really knew what the name of my site would be.

So – I say all of that to say, I hope those that are subscribed to me via e-mail, it will be a seamless transition. If not, I apologize!  Please, come back and find me!

Thanks again for reading!


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